Blah blah

Just a quick update because I could use some positive vibes sent my way. Weaned off my old antidepressant this week and started the new one. Good news is it hasn't effected my blood pressure and have a little more energy, don't want to sleep all the time. But since I'm not up to full effectiveness on the new one, I'm feeling really depressed. Cried a lot today, feel irritable and overwhelmed.

Micah is feeling about the same as me. Got a one day suspension today for ripping up a paper and calling his science teacher the "B" word. He admits the paper, but swears he did not say the word that got him suspended. I tend to believe him as he seems to only be getting in real trouble with this teacher that he only is with 45min a day. I had a discussion with the principal, asking again for some support from the school system instead of just punishments, but feel like I'm beating my head up against the wall. So we'll be having some meetings soon I hope. Last spring we did all this testing and had meetings that got us nowhere. They said yes he has ADD, ODD, depression but since it isn't effecting him at school we don't need to do anything. I reminded the principal of this conversation and said now that it is effecting him at school something needs to be done. He says the punishments etc. would be the same even with some accommodation, so what good is that going to do. I pointed out that at least we'd have a plan and be working as a team to help Micah instead of punishing him for lack of motivation, apathy and outburst which are all not really Micah but symptoms of his diagnoses. Of course I think he should be punished for bad behavior but I also think the teachers could see this behavior escalating and sent him for a time out or to the counselor to talk it out, preventing the anger from escalating to this outburst.

I know that this stress is disproportionately worse due to my own depression and that this cycle will head back up again but it's just really hard right now. It's also effecting my eating and exercise. Yoga makes me feel better but even that has been hard to stay motivated to get to.