Addiction

I am now starting to see that my relationship with food is going to be changed forever. I got another fill on Thursday. Dr. Mobley and I had a long conversation about if I'm at my sweet spot. This basically is the spot banded people need to be at. It's when 3oz. of protein and 1/2 cup of something else keeps us full for 4 hr. I'd say I have been eating with in those boundaries more than 50% of the time, but when the opportunity arises I can hold a lot more. My basic day for a month has been a protein bar for breakfast. Salad with protein for lunch. And dinner varies. If I'm going to yoga I usually have another protein bar for dinner and then a 4th meal later a night. Lately a lean cuisine...most of the time a snack, fruit, popcorn, stick cheese. He thought this was good for me, but I still feel like I'm dieting. I really want to be physically unable to eat anymore than necessary. Right now I have great motivation, but I know my self and I will lose it eventually and this diet won't work. That's why I got the band..it's forced will power. I told him that I can still eat to much at times. At mom and dad's anniversary I ate way too much. I didn't get sick but felt very full. He put in another 1 cc. I have 11 out of 14 in my band. AND I THINK I'M FINALLY THERE. I have to eat really slow now. I have gotten sick 2 times, once before the last fill and once today. So I'm learning. Today's episode was not very nice. We went to the Greek festival...my LAST festival. It's all just a waste of money. The boys want to do rides and games. I stood in a long line for a gyro, one of my favorites. I wasn't crazy enough to think I could eat the whole thing, but I at least wanted the meat with sauce. So I ate about 4 strip of meat and that was it. I ate it way to fast and had to hide behind the carny vans and got sick. So today I have eaten 1 power bar, 3oz. of chicken, and just had one piece of thin crust pizza, slowly with a fork. And I'm totally OK with this. My life is changing and I'm happy. I need to give myself time to learn these new skills.